


What You Don't Feel

by Blue_Night



Series: The Pegasus Alliance [1]
Category: Stargate - All Media Types, Stargate Atlantis, Stargate SG-1
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alien Culture, Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Developing Relationship, Friendship/Love, Goa'uld (Stargate), Hate to Love, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post-Canon, Post-Season/Series 05, Shooting, Weapons, Wraith (Stargate), Wraith Feeding, descriptions of fights with weapons and killing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-13
Updated: 2018-08-30
Packaged: 2019-02-14 10:43:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13006095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blue_Night/pseuds/Blue_Night
Summary: Atlantis has left the Pegasus Galaxy to save Earth from the attack of the Super-Hive. Will John Sheppard find a way to bring the City of the Ancients back where she belongs? And what about Todd, the Wraith who helped him defeat the Super-Hive and who has a strange connection to John ever since they made in Kolya's prison? Will John be able to save him?





	1. Stuck on Earth

**Author's Note:**

> The reason why I delayed writing this part of my Pegasus Alliance series doesn't exist any longer, and I really wanted to write John and Todd together again. I know that I shouldn't add another part to this series before finishing some of the others, but I am in the mood for more Wraith, and I couldn't resist to at least write and post the first chapter.
> 
> I have the plot rather clear in my mind, I hope that John and Todd will cooperate. :-)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John has a talk with General Landry, and it doesn't go the way he had hoped it would do. Visiting Todd in his prison cell is not helpful to make him be less worried either, and the cherry on top is what Rodney tells him about the Wraith when he visits him in his lab to say goodbye to him...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had this chapter clear in my mind for days, and it really wanted to be written. I must admit that I'm a little bit proud of the outcome, I hope you will like it too. The next update will depend on your feedback, and I want to see to Evan and Paricius too of course. <33

“The IOA insists on Atlantis staying on Earth for the time being, and they demand to be involved in the exploration of the city. The president agreed to their requests, he also thinks that Atlantis should stay on Earth.” General Landry leaned back in his chair, looking up at John Sheppard with a regretful expression on his face. “I'm sorry, Colonel, but there is nothing I can do.”

Colonel John Sheppard just stared at his superior with a blank face. The military leader of Atlantis was pretty sure that General Landry wasn't as sorry for Atlantis having been claimed by the IOA as he pretended to be, because it would also provide him with the technology, knowledge and weapons he could only have dreamed of before the City of the Ancients had landed on the Pacific Ocean near San Francisco.

There was no way that the US military would give the control of the city out of hand, but the demands of the IOA gave them the opportunity to keep Atlantis trapped on Earth for much longer than they probably had first hoped that they could keep it in the Milky Way Galaxy.

Maybe John even had to consider himself the former military leader of Atlantis now, John wasn't so sure whether he still held this post or if he had already been replaced by somebody else without Landry telling him that.

“I see. There are still Wraith in the Pegasus Galaxy threatening the human inhabitants of the galaxy, they will be lost without Atlantis! We can't do that to them!” John tried to make the older officer see the reason why Atlantis had to return to her home as quickly as possible.

The Pegasus Galaxy had also become John's real home a long time ago, something he had tried to forget when they had decided to save Earth with the City of the Ancients. John had enjoyed being on Earth for a while, but he had felt restless and homesick for several days by now, craving to go back where he truly belonged now, and it became worse with every day that passed without him knowing when they would be able to return to the small galaxy they had barely started to explore properly.

“They have survived ten thousand years without Atlantis' protection as far as I know, Colonel. The Wraith in the Pegasus Galaxy are not our responsibility, and I doubt that they will extinguish the human races living there. They would sign their own death warrant if they did that after all, because all of them would die of starvation then.”

John Sheppard couldn't help but snort at that. “They would find a way to come to our galaxy, there is really no doubt left about that, General. They have already proved that they are capable of bridging the huge distance, and they will do it again. They have tried it beforehand when they attacked the Midway Station, and without us keeping them from doing so, they will use this way again sooner than you could possibly expect them to do. Plus, the Wraith _are_ our responsibility because we have been the ones waking them up all at once in the first place.”

General Landry just gave him a long, silent look. “You have been the one waking them up, Colonel.”

John's jaw worked, but he wouldn't give him the satisfaction of commenting on that. “So Ronon Dex and Teyla Emagan are stuck here as well? They have given up everything to save a planet that isn't their responsibility or concern at all, do you really want to condemn them to living their lives in world they don't belong to?”

“They came here freely and willingly, and they did it in the knowledge that they might not be able to return to their own galaxy afterwards. But there is still the Midway Station left, and we have still spaceships left that can reach the Pegasus Galaxy. I've never said that we will give up our outposts in the Pegasus Galaxy, and we will be prepared if the Wraith really try to attack the Midway Station again, don't you doubt that, Colonel. Plus, I will see to the Athosian and the Satedan being able to return in a couple of months, you have my word on that.”

John resisted the urge to ball his fists. “I see,” he repeated in a shallow voice, and the lump suddenly forming in his throat didn't make it easier for him to utter the next question.

“What about Todd? He can't wait for months for his return. He will be starved to death before that.”

General Landry raised one of his eyebrows. “I can't believe that you're actually concerned about the Wraith. He is the enemy, Colonel, you really shouldn't forget that.”

“The Wraith are our enemies, General, that's true, but Todd isn't. He has been our ally for a rather long time. We can't let him die just like that after what he has done for us.” John tried to convince himself that his worries came only from his sense of responsibility and the feeling of being indebted to the damn Wraith who stubbornly refused to stay out of his life ever since they had met in the bunker prison of the Geniis.

Todd had saved their asses, millions of innocent lives, sentencing his former crew to death as he had given himself over to John in order to help him defeat the Super-Hive, trusting the human colonel that he would protect him and not allow the military command on Earth or the IOA to use him for their own more than dubious and morally questionable experiments.

“Since when have you changed your mind about this Wraith actually still being a lethal threat to us? I have been told several times that you are the one threatening to kill 'Todd' how you call him each time you're in the same room with him. And now you are speaking on his behalf and asking me to spare him? What do you think shall I do with him? Setting him free so he can rage in the streets of San Francisco and kill the innocent citizens by sucking them dry?” General Landry pursed his lips in a questioning way, not even trying to keep his anger and his mockery out of his voice.

“Of course, not, General. We wouldn't need to even talk about such things if you agreed to send him back to the Pegasus Galaxy before he has to feed again,” John countered, taking a deep breath to calm himself down and not yell at his superior. “Besides, this is something entirely different, a completely different situation than the ones you've been referring to. He is alone here, far away from his home, and he was willing to save us and sacrifice his own brethren. He might have expected to die during the battle against the Super-Hive, but he trusted us to honor his actions and not betray him afterwards! Todd is a warrior – a soldier – himself, he has faced death more often than we can only imagine. Dying in a fight is not comparable to dying the slow and painful death of starvation or because of the experiments the IOA surely want to do with him. We owe him better than that.”

“We owe him nothing, Colonel Sheppard. He was the one stealing the ZPM to build a Super-Hive, and he only came to you because his own second had betrayed him. He came to you because he wanted revenge and because he knew that his own race would turn against him, so stop worrying about him. He's just getting what he deserves at last.”

Putting it that way, John had only little left to say against it. He didn't share General Landry's view on things, but he realized that he wouldn't get anywhere if he annoyed his superior more than he had already done it as it seemed, at least in this moment.

“Can I at least talk to him?” he only asked instead, trying hard to keep his voice quiet and calm. Landry observed him thoughtfully for a moment, but nodded slowly after a few seconds, much to John's relief.

“It won't do any harm to let you talk to him, I guess, maybe you will even manage to convince him that he'll better cooperate with us. You are not needed in Atlantis at the moment, and I decided to send you on the next off-world missions together with Colonel Mitchell and Dr. Jackson. Dr. McKay and Major Lorne will stay in Atlantis due to their knowledge of the city and their ATA-gene, but I think it wiser to keep you away from the city for some time. Richard Woolsey is still in charge, the IOA trusts him to carry out their demands better than someone new would be able to do. You can return to Atlantis to say goodbye to your friends and pack your things, but I expect you to report to me tomorrow at twelve hundred, Colonel Sheppard.”

John pressed his lips to a thin line. “Understood, sir.” There wasn't much time left for him, but he would at least be able to talk to Rodney before he had to go off world, and being in Mitchell's and Dr. Jackson's team was better than what he had thought that Landry had at stake for him.

“You're dismissed, Colonel. Lt. Warner will bring you to the cell where the Wraith is.” Landry reached for one of the reports lying on his desk, and John turned around on his heels and strode over to the door. He didn't thank the older officer, just left his office silently to nod at the young lieutenant smiling cautiously at him. “Bring me to the Wraith, Lieutenant,” he said, hardly recognizing his own voice.

“Of course, Colonel, please follow me,” Lt. Warner said with both, empathy and curiosity audible in his voice. John walked behind him with a stern face, the lump in his throat growing bigger and bigger on the entire way through the long and gloomy tunnels of the huge Cheyenne Mountain complex, nearly choking him by the time they finally reached the thick metal door where Todd was waiting for him behind it, trusting a fragile human that he wouldn't let him die.

 

\-------------------------------------------

 

The cell was just big enough for a man of average size to cross it with four large steps, a tiny square room with a small cot attached to the wall opposite the door and a table attached to the wall at the left side of the door. One single abandoned and hard looking chair stood before the table, and the walls were gray like the stony floor and the ridiculously looking dress Todd had been forced to wear instead of his own black Wraith clothing.

Everything in this cell was of a depressing gray color, even Todd's normally silver-white hair and his greenish skin looked gray in the dim light of the lonely bulb hanging down from the ceiling.

John had to admit that the ancient being wore the embarrassing dress with dignity and surprising elegance, at least judging by the brief uncomfortable look he had shot at him when he had entered the cell.

The USAF colonel with the messy dark hair found himself incapable of looking Todd in the eyes, his flickering gaze traveling over the grayish walls instead, the empty table and the door just anywhere but the tall and slim alien space-vampire sitting opposite him. Everything inside him screamed to leave the cell and run as fast as he could until he would reach the ground level and be able to breathe fresh air outside again, and John had a hard time not to turn around and beg Lt. Warner to unlock the door and let him escape.

Todd sat on the edge of the cot with a straight back, his yellow-golden cat's eyes fixed on John's face.

John shot him another quick uncomfortable look, forcing his lips to curl into a weak copy of his crooked smile.

“I hope that they have been treating you well, Todd,” he started their awkward talk at last, averting his gaze again to stare at a point somewhere over the Wraith's head.

“As well as it was to be expected, John Sheppard,” the alien male replied evenly, “is there something interesting to be seen on the wall, or are you just avoiding  looking at me?”

John flinched, and he could feel his cheeks heating up with embarrassment and shame.

“The second, I guess.” Todd deserved at least honesty, John thought.

“I see. I do understand that this is hard for you, Sheppard, but I would be grateful if you would find the courage to look me in the eyes when you tell me that there is nothing you can do for me.”

John closed his eyes for a few seconds, leaning against the wall next to the closed door for support. When he opened them again, he looked Todd straight in his eyes though, forcing his gaze to lock on the alien features of the dangerous creature. John had always found Todd attractive and appealing in an odd way, even though he had refused to admit his attraction for the other male even to himself until this moment.

“I've tried, Todd, I've really tried. The IOA wants Atlantis to stay on Earth so they can claim the city for themselves, and General Landry refuses to send you back to the Pegasus Galaxy with a ship or by using the Midway Station. I'm really sorry.”

The Wraith returned his glance impassively. “You don't need to be sorry, John Sheppard. You didn't promise me anything except for the countless times when you said that you would kill me if I did something you wouldn't like, and these have been promises you yet have to keep. I didn't expect you to help me escape your superiors after defeating the Super-Hive with my aid.”

Ouch, that hurt, even though John didn't really know why hearing Todd saying out loud what was the truth as they both knew quite well should hurt so much. Maybe it was because John could see disappointment and fear flicker over Todd's face for the tiniest of moments. Todd might not have expected John to come to his help, but he had apparently at least hoped that the human colonel would find a way to send him back to his own galaxy, a hope that had been crushed by John's lame excuse now.

The military commander of Atlantis – John refused to think of himself as the former commander of Atlantis at this point – knew that Todd didn't feel fear because John had just told him that he would die here on Earth without seeing his home and his brethren again or because of the experiments awaiting him as certain as Dollars to doughnuts.

No, Todd feared to experience the same he had had to endure for more than ten years in the prison cell of the Geniis, being kept almost starved to death for decades and never seeing the moon or the sun again. The proud Commander feared to lose his dignity and everything that differentiated him from a machine or a wild and dumb animal, and John was sure that Todd would rather die here and now instead of slowly perishing over months and perhaps even years.

John felt anger at Todd's behalf rising in his guts. The ancient Wraith Commander was one of the smartest and most intelligent beings John had ever met, being an even match to Rodney's genius, and it was real and actually rather cruel torture to keep him in a gray prison cell all by himself and without providing him with anything he could busy his mind with. Wraith were a telepathic race, and Todd must feel incredibly lonely without the presence of his brethren in his head. Giving him 'harmless' books to read wouldn't do any harm, but General Landry hadn't even thought of that. To him, Todd was simply a threat, a lethal and dangerous enemy, not worthy of being treated like an intelligent being with some basic rights.

The colonel knew that he had treated Todd the same way often enough, but Todd was completely alone here on Earth, and he had helped saving millions of people Todd wouldn't have needed to worry about at all. He had done that because of John, and John felt responsible personally for how the military command treated the Wraith.

“When was the last time you've fed, Todd? How long can you go without having to feed again?” The colonel with the dark hair asked to break the heavy silence between them.

Todd hadn't moved, and his face was still calm when he considered John thoughtfully. “I'd suspected that I wouldn't get the chance to feed any time soon after coming to Atlantis, so I fed before I contacted you. A couple of weeks, I guess. It depends on what your people plan to do with me.”

John swallowed against the nausea suddenly pooling in his stomach. “I see. So I don't have to fear that you shall try and feed on me during my visit at least.” This made Todd flinch visibly, and John hated himself for his words.

 _'You don't owe him anything!'_ he reminded himself, but it sounded wrong and not really convincing, but only like another proof that he had once more let Todd down when the Wraith had trusted him with his life for the umpteenth time.

“And here I was told that I have a strange sense of humor,” the Wraith murmured to himself, increasing John's bad conscience with that. “You don't need to fear that I shall feed on you, John Sheppard. I wouldn't do that to you. Besides, where would be the sense in feeding on the only ally I've left here?”

John chewed on that for a moment. “I'd been your only ally when we escaped the Geniis too, but this important fact didn't keep you from feeding on me nevertheless.” It sounded like the accusation it actually was, and John was astonished for a second that he was still holding this against Todd after all that had happened between them after their memorable first encounter.

Todd hesitated. “It was different back then, Sheppard. I was starved for years, severely injured and I knew that I would have the chance to give back to you what I had taken. I most likely wouldn't get the chance to do that this time so no, I won't feed on you.”

“Why being considerate of me, Wraith? I let you down and betrayed you.”

This time it was Todd finally averting his eyes as if he wanted to hide some feelings from John the human wasn't allowed to see in the Wraith's opinion. John didn't know what kind of emotions Todd could want to hide from him, but he was glad that the pretty infuriating and somehow fascinating alien male didn't scrutinize him any longer. John couldn't help but think that Todd saw more than John would like him to see, maybe even caught glimpses of his thoughts and unwanted attraction for him.

“You did what you did to save your home world and your people, John Sheppard. I don't hold your actions against you, I would probably have done the same.” Todd's multi-toned voice sounded hoarse, and he stared unseeing at the gray wall over the table.

Maybe he would have, but he would also have found a way to help John escape afterwards.

“And if I offered myself willingly to you?” The words came out of his mouth before he even knew that he had wanted to say them.

“No, not even then, John Sheppard.” Todd was still looking at the wall, ignoring John's tries to meet his gaze.

John knew when he was defeated. “I will come back to you, Todd, I promise you that I'll find a way to bring you back to the Pegasus Galaxy before it's too late.”

“You should be careful with making promises, Colonel Sheppard. You're not really good at keeping them – at least not when it comes to the promises you've given me. You still have to prove that you will kill me if I do something that displeases you.”

Todd finally looked up at him, but his expression gave nothing away of what he thought. John's throat was tight again, but he cleared the lump away determinedly. “It seems so. I have to prove to you then that I can keep the promises I make when it really counts.”

The Wraith cocked his head to the side. “There is one thing you can promise me, Sheppard.”

“And what would that be?” John asked warily, sensing that he wouldn't like what Todd wanted from him.

“You can promise me that you will kill me if you don't find a way to bring me back to the Pegasus. Promise me that you won't let me die here a slow and painful death of starvation or because of their experiments. You're a soldier, and I'm asking you this from soldier to soldier. Don't let them do to me what the Genii did.”

John stared down at the Wraith with burning eyes. “I promise you, Todd,” he said at last, turning around to hammer at the door, leaving Todd's cell without any other word, unable to look back at him one last time.

John made his way to the elevator in silence, and he could still feel the golden cat's eyes on his back when he had turned around the next corner.

 

\------------------------------------------

 

“I'd rather die from your hand than letting them do this to me myself.” Rodney didn't look up from his task, his fingers flying over the keyboard without the genius even looking at them.

John had found him in his lab when he had returned to Atlantis to pack his things, listening to Rodney's usual rants about the stupid scientists the IOA had sent to explore the city with both, melancholy and gratitude. Melancholy because he would miss Rodney and his permanent complaining when he was off world with Mitchell and Dr. Jackson, and gratitude because he was relieved that neither General Landry nor the IOA had tried to replace McKay with another head scientist so far.

If Rodney and Major Lorne stayed in the city, then there was hope left that they would find a way to bring Atlantis back where it belonged. It might take some time, but there was still hope left.

“I know, I feel the same way,” John now said, remembering how Rodney had once tried to make Todd feed on him in order to save his sister. Rodney hated and feared the Wraith more than John did, but he respected Todd as the kindred spirit he was when it came to science and knowledge, and John was sure that Rodney had learned to see Todd not only as the hateful enemy over the years, but respected and maybe even liked him to some extent.

“I was yet surprised that he refused to feed on me when I offered it to him,” he mused, his conversation with the ancient Commander repeating itself in his head again and again ever since he had left him.

Rodney only snorted, peering up from his screen for a second. “That's not surprising at all, Sheppard. You are the last human Todd would ever feed from even if he was in dire straits.”

John stared at him, taken aback. “And why would that be the case? I remember Todd once having said that my life-force was the most delicious life-force he had ever tasted. He didn't look as if he had been joking when he said that.”

Rodney paused in his frantic typing for a moment. “A rather weird compliment, that's for sure, I'm not sure you should take it as one, Sheppard. Todd was starved and tortured when Kolya let him feed on you, no wonder you 'tasted' deliciously to him. A cow would have tasted deliciously to him if he had been able to feed on it.”

John pulled a face at this offense, but Rodney waved his hand to silence him, speaking up again before John had any chance to react to the not very charming comparison with a cow. “But even if that was true, Todd would never feed on you again nonetheless, you should really know that by now.”

“And you're so sure about that exactly why, McKay?” John asked irritated, wondering if the scientist perhaps knew something Todd hadn't told him.

“You're one of the most intelligent people I know, Sheppard – except for me, my sister Jeanie, Jennifer and Todd of course,” Rodney stated, shaking his head. His voice had become soft when he had spoken out loud the name of his fiancée, and John was still amazed about how much his friend and teammate had changed since he and Dr. Keller had become a couple.

“But sometimes you're really dense,” Rodney now continued. “I'd really thought that you had realized that in the meantime.”

“Realized what?” John asked, rubbing his temples. A bad headache was throbbing behind them since his talk with Landry, and it had become worse after his talk with Todd.

“The reason why our proud Wraith Commander always came back to you – why he even used the retro-virus on himself and his crew. If you don't know the reason why Todd came to you and helped you to defeat the Super-Hive, then you're probably the only one still being oblivious – except for Ronon perhaps,” Rodney added thoughtfully.

The scientist came around the console to lean against it, regarding John attentively with his head cocked to the side.

“I have no bloody clue what you're talking about,” John snapped, finally running out of patience.

Rodney sighed, pursing his lips. “Todd used the retro-virus and helped you to defeat the Super-Hive for the same reason why I risked my life without thinking when Jennifer was trapped. For the same reason we risk our lives for our teammates and friends without hesitation whenever they are in danger.”

McKay paused, and all John could do was to stare incredulously at him, still not really getting what the scientist was talking about.

Rodney shook his head, obviously torn between amusement and disbelief. “You still don't know it, do you, Sheppard?”

John swallowed. “No, I don't.”

“Love, Sheppard. Love is the reason why this Wraith would rather die himself than feed on you again. Todd is in love with you, John.”


	2. The New Kind Of Normal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone has to adapt to their new lives being stuck on Earth, Todd in his gray prison cell as much as John as a member of Colonel Mitchell's team and Rodney as the one trying to keep everything together in Atlantis. But this is harder than all of them have feared it to be, and then something happens that might put everything to an end before they have even had the chance to make a new start.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My dear readers,  
> thank you so much for your overwhelming feedback to the first chapter, I'm still stunned. <33 I really hope that I can meet your expectations and won't disappoint you! Please keep up your support, your Kudos, comments and bookmarks are really the only reason for me to keep writing and posting my Wraih stories, so please feed my muse with them if you want to know what happens next!!
> 
> I had actually wanted to write this story from John's and Todd's POV only, but I had to add Rodney's POV for obvious reasons like you will see in the last part of this chapter, and I do believe that he deserves to get his POV in some of my Wraith stories now and then.
> 
> I also couldn't resist explaining Todd's name in this chapter. I know the 'real' reason why this special Wraith got the name Todd, and it is less romantic than what Todd wants to believe, the heads of the series named him after one of their co-workers, he was responsible for the masks if I remeber it correctly. (The star-tattoo is inspired by the masks of the group KISS). Knowing how 'careless' the John of the series named the Wraith he had to deal with, Todd would probably be disappointed, but his name is actually an old and honorable name that suits our sometimes pretty cunning Wraith quite well. I hope that the first part of the chapter won't be too boring for all of you who already knew the meaning of the name 'Todd' beforehand. <33
> 
> I will try to write the next chapter asap - depending on the feedback this one will get - but I will update WYDFind at first because Germanus and Richard need to exchange their Christmas presents before spring comes. ;-)
> 
> Trigger warning: this chapter contains descriptions of fights and shooting, which is more or less unavoidable in a story based on the two Stargate series, but I want to leave a warning beforehand nevertheless.

The Wraith sometimes wondered when he had started to think of himself as Todd.

It must have been a rather long process actually, but he still tried to remember the first moment he had done it now and then, unsure whether or not the times his memory showed him had truly been the first ones – or if there were even earlier ones his mind simply chose to ignore because of what these memories would actually imply if he allowed them to come to the surface of his consciousness.

His kind had never been in the need of using names like the head-blind humans had to do it to address and recognize their brothers and sisters. The mind-images his race used to address each other with or make clear who they were referring to when they communicated with each other telepathically were much more complex and complicated than a simple name could ever be. No single word or name existing of two or three words perhaps could ever describe the unique and rich personality of a Wraith like those mind-images actually did.

Yet he had started to use the odd name Todd John Sheppard had given him not only when he had had to deal with humans, but also when he had been among his own kin, and somewhere along the long road that had led him to the gray prison cell where he was trapped in now he had realized that he had actually become Todd.

Working together with Dr. McKay had meant that he had been granted access to the database of Atlantis for a few times, and he had used the opportunity one day and searched for the name 'Todd' in the database, curious about the reason why the colonel with the fascinating hazel-green eyes had chosen this name of all names for him.

The Wraith had actually been pleased about what he had found, even though he somehow doubted that John Sheppard had thought of it when he had chosen Todd to be the perfect name for one of his lethal enemies.

It had still sounded a little bit weird to the ancient alien male, but it was actually a rather old name and came from an ancient tribe called Celts - which had lived on a large island on Earth several thousand years and centuries ago. It had probably been not only one single tribe, but a lot of different tribes, but they had shared the same language and origin and - according to the database at least - they had been brave and skilled warriors.

Having been gifted with a name that some of these amazing old warriors had answered to was actually not as offending and humiliating as being called Todd had seemed to be at the beginning, and the Wraith did understand the human necessity to call each other by different names very well.

The meaning of the name was referring to an animal still living on Earth and which was called 'fox' nowadays, and some of the features humans attributed to this animal – like slyness for example - were features Todd possessed as well, so his name probably suited him in some strange way.

The Wraith was aware that he would even have accepted his name if it had actually been an offense, just because it had been John Sheppard choosing it for him – just because the most special human Todd had ever met in ten thousand years had bothered enough to give him a name instead of trying to kill him right away whenever their paths had crossed again after their first memorable encounter.

Todd suppressed a resigned sigh when his mind drifted to the surface again, becoming aware of the tiny gray cell that was his home now. Practicing meditation had saved his sanity when he had been a prisoner of the Genii for more than ten years, and Todd had reached true mastery in it, but he had much more problems with slipping into this special state of not thinking about anything here on Earth than he had had problems with mediating back then in another tiny and gray prison cell.

It was probably because he was so far away from his real home, the Pegasus Galaxy, and so incredibly far away from his own kin, separated from them without any chance that a Dart, scout-ship or even Hive would come close enough to the planet where he was waiting for anyone to rescue him to sense his presence and help him.

The unbidden thought that he was probably the most hated Wraith among all Wraith now sent a small icy shiver down on his back, but Todd suppressed it, not wanting to believe that all of his brethren would turn their backs on him if he ever managed to return to them one day in the future.

There must be at least a few of his old friends and brothers in arms left who were still loyal to him, and Todd was determined to come back to them and convince them that there had to be a better way to live together with humans than both races trying to kill the other one every time they met somewhere.

But this was something he couldn't think of now, not before he had found a way to escape the IOA and the SGC. Todd's heart clenched with a sudden bout of mortal fear he had rigorously suppressed until this moment, but which was almost crushing him now as he acknowledged the terrible truth once more.

He was completely alone here, alone and without any real chance of rescue or escape. The only one who had perhaps been interested in saving him was gone too, leaving him without one last glance back.

John Sheppard had given him a name and aroused false hopes in him with that, making the foolish Wraith he actually was come back to him again and again like a puppet pulled on its strings. There had never been any real chance that the human with the astonishing hazel-green eyes would ever look at him with any other expression in his eyes than disgust and contempt, but Todd hadn't wanted to see the truth but only tried harder to convince the dark-haired colonel that he wasn't the monster John Sheppard considered him to be.

But the human had left him at the complete mercy of people who considered him a rare exhibit they were allowed to experiment with as it pleased them with a shrug of his shoulders, bereaving him of the last tiny spark of hope Todd had still nursed deep in his heart that he would be treated like the sentient and intelligent being he actually was.

The Wraith who was Todd now could only hope that John Sheppard would for once keep the most important one of the many false promises he had made so carelessly over the years, keep the last promise he had given him and come back to him to end his existence before they had taken the rest of what was left of his humanity.

 

\---------------------------------------

 

Two weeks after his memorable talk with McKay, John was still trying to wrap his head around what his friend and teammate had revealed to him.

The colonel with the messy dark hair was lying behind a thick bush and emptying his magazine at the horde of Jaffa who were streaming from the opened Stargate in a seemingly endless row, and he should really focus on finding a way out of this mouse trap instead of musing about McKay's fateful words, which kept repeating themselves in his head in an endless loop.

_'Todd is in love with you, John. Todd is in love with you, John...'_

The heat of a rod-weapon fired at him brought his attention back to the things happening in front of him, and John was almost grateful for the distraction from his disturbing thoughts. He aimed his gun at the Jaffa who had managed to come very close to the bush where he had sought cover, and the strangled cry his opponent let out when he fell down to the ground pulled a satisfied snarl from him.

The wormhole had broken down in the meantime, and there were only ten more Jaffas left from the perhaps twenty that had come through the gate, the others lying motionless on the ground John focused on the three that were the closest to him, wishing for his team to be with him so badly that it choked him for a split second.

Colonel Mitchell and Dr. Jackson were great and experienced team-members, and Lt. Winter did a great job too, but John missed Rodney, Teyla and Ronon deeply, especially the wordless understanding that came naturally with the years and countless missions they had carried out together.

The other Jaffas had apparently lost their courage seeing their comrades being shot one after the other, because one of them now started to dial out with hectic movements, ducking his head between his shoulders as much as his helmet allowed him to do so, while the others gave him coverage, shooting blindly at the line of thick bushes where the new SG1 were lying behind them, returning the fire with much more precision.

The event horizon established with a loud whoosh, and the Jaffa warriors threw themselves through the gate without caring about their shot brothers, their only goal to get away from the ambush they had walked in by accident.

John sent some more bullets after them, but the remaining nine Jaffas reached the other side of the wormhole safely, the last one who had dialed out running in a wild zigzag-course to the gate and jumping through it before Mitchell's next shot reached him, the gate shutting down behind him and making it impossible for John's team to follow them to the planet he had dialed.

John looked over to where the other colonel lay behind a large tree, signing with him, and they waited for another five seconds before they got up to set their feet on the clearing. Dr. Jackson followed them, walking over to the last Jaffa John had shot straight away.

John followed much slower, opening the helmets of the two Jaffas that lay closest to him, and he found his suspicion proved right when he saw their faces, bitter bile rising in his throat. They had been so young, too young to be soldiers and fight, but the Goa'uld they served didn't certainly care about such things, all they cared about was power and more power.

John mused briefly about the interesting question what would happen if one of these ugly worms would encounter a Wraith, both of them dangerous and powerful alien creatures striving for power.

Goa'ulds liked to consider themselves gods – something Wraith normally didn't do as John had to admit, their human worshipers did, but not the Wraith themselves. Both were long-living species, but Wraith didn't need a sarcophagus of the Ancients for that, and they didn't lose their sanity and reason like Goa'ulds abusing the sarcophagus eventually did.

Wraith killed humans without blinking like Goa'ulds did, but most of them only did that in order to survive, needing to feed on them not to die of starvation, and even though they had powerful mental abilities, but they normally didn't oppress humans for years and centuries like Goa'ulds did with their hosts.

Wraith didn't use armies of human soldiers for fighting their wars like the Goa'ulds did with the Jaffa, fighting their own battles and risking their own lives. They didn't just use the technology of other races like the Goa'ulds mostly did with the Ancient technology or the ones of other species, they had built their own astonishing Wraith technology.

John decided that he liked 'his' Wraith of the Pegasus Galaxy better than the Goa'ulds of the Milky Way Galaxy – if there was anything to like about any of both species, that is. The dark-haired colonel frowned, asking himself what had gotten into him all of a sudden that he found something good to say about his lethal and most hated enemies.

 _'But Todd is not your enemy. He's your ally and he has helped you several times. He has feelings for you, and he deserves to be rescued before it's too late!'_ a small voice whispered in his head, and John swallowed hard as he tried to get the voice out of his head again. He was on a mission and couldn't risk getting distracted by a certain Wraith who refused to leave him alone, no matter whether he was awake or sleeping, following him even in his restless sleep.

“He's still alive!” the archaeologist called them now, drawing John's attention back to them as he carefully removed the helmet from the Jaffa's head. John and Cameron exchanged a quick glance as they made their way to the injured Jaffa. “Lt. Winter, you'll keep your eyes on the gate!” Colonel Mitchell ordered, and the young Marine nodded and raised his weapon, taking up position next to the dialing console and watching the gate with narrowed eyes for any sign of sudden activity.

John knelt down beside Dr. Jackson, and he wasn't surprised to see that this Jaffa was hardly grown up too, more a boy than an experienced warrior. No wonder that the four of them had been able to defeat twenty Jaffa, causing the remaining nine to flee from the place of their disgrace. From what Mitchell had told him, they wouldn't have stood a chance against the Jaffa if they had been older and real soldiers, outnumbering their small group to such an extent.

The chaos the Ori had left in the Milky Way Galaxy had affected most of the inhabited planets, the Lucianer Alliance was growing, and the Goa'ulds were of course trying to regain strength, but they had lost most of their territories and Jaffa armies. Replacing them with new ones would take years, and John feared that there would be much more young boys like these being sacrificed during the process without standing any real chance against their much more experienced adversaries.

“We can't leave him here, Cam, we can't leave a boy here to die like this,” Daniel Jackson now said, peering up at Colonel Mitchell. “Besides, he might be able to tell us more about the new Goa'uld Du'ral he probably belongs to if we save his life.”

John had read some reports about this Goa'uld, a former follower of Ba'al. Du'ral was trying to expand his territory, and he could become dangerous rather quickly if he managed to bring more planets under his control than he had already done it over the past few months, one of the reasons why the IOA and the SGC were so keen to keep Atlantis on Earth, thinking that they could use the City of the Ancients to fight against Du'ral's spaceships.

John understood their wish to have a spaceship like Atlantis to fight against the Goa'ulds, but the city belonged to Pegasus, and she needed to go back there, no matter how Landry and all the others actually thought about it. John was determined to find a way to bring her back where she belonged, and if it was the last thing he did in his life.

Mitchell looked down at the groaning Jaffa with an impassive face now, thinking about how to solve the dilemma they were in after their unexpected encounter with Du'ral's Jaffa warriors.

SG1 had actually come for the ruins SG15 had found on this planet a couple of days ago – and the Naquadah-mine near the ruins. General Landry wanted Dr. Jackson to check the ruins and Colonel Mitchell to check the mine to see whether or not a bigger exploration was worth the risk. Naquadah was precious, but it was clear that other parties would be interested in the mine and the ruins as well, and the sudden appearance of the Jaffa proved that he had been right with that.

“We've come here for the ruins and the mine, and I don't want to leave this planet without having checked the ruins at least, Daniel,” Cameron said, and John could see that he was weighing the options they had, “but you're right, he's just a boy, and we can't leave him here.” Mitchell looked at John with a thoughtful expression, apparently torn between his wish to check the ruins himself and sending his fellow colonel to do it. John understood him pretty well, staying behind was always the hardest decision to make for the leader of a team.

“Sheppard, you have the gene, I want you to go with Daniel to check the ruins,” the colonel with the deep blue eyes finally decided after one two or three seconds. “Lt. Winter will go back to Earth with the Jaffa, and I will stay here and make sure that no one comes through the gate. I'll keep the wormhole open so no one can dial in.”

John actually hadn't expected that. He had noticed the other colonel's inner battle – having had to make such decisions himself more often than he could actually count – but he hadn't expected Mitchell to send him with the archaeologist and stay behind himself.

Cameron was the leader of SG1, he was the one working with Daniel, and John had already resigned himself to being the one covering their backs when the other two who were left of their team checked the former village. “Are you sure, Mitchell?” he asked therefore to make sure that he had heard right, and the other colonel nodded grimly. “Yes, I am. I might not like it, but you're the one having the gene, Sheppard, so you are the better choice here.”

He turned his attention back to the Jaffa, who had lost consciousness during their talk. “Daniel, please check the address they've dialed, I want to be prepared. We have to hurry, otherwise he'll be dead before we can bring him to Earth.”

The archaeologist nodded and stood up to walk over to the dialing console. Lt. Winter came over to them, carefully lifting the Jaffa up and onto his shoulders. “I hate fighting against boys,” he muttered, and John pulled a face. “The same here, Lieutenant. But neither Wraith, nor Goa'uld do care about that,” he said hoarsely, flinching at his own words because the reminded him of Todd and his own bad conscience towards the damn Wraith again.

Somehow, John was pretty sure that Todd hated fighting against boys too, and the memory of the look on the Wraith's face when he had asked him to kill him before the IOA and the SGC would use him for the experiments was still haunting him.

“I've gotten the address they've dialed. I'm dialing Earth now, Lt. Winter,” Daniel broke in on his musings, and the young lieutenant started off towards the gate with the Jaffa. John watched him disappear through the wormhole, wishing that he could go with him and assure Todd that he would save him.

But this wasn't possible, and so John simply turned around and followed Daniel Jackson to the ancient village with a straight back and a stony face, but his heart was heavy with the words that started to repeat themselves in his mind all over again.

_'Todd is in love with you, John. Todd is in love with you, John...'_

 

\---------------------------------------------

 

There were only few things Rodney McKay hated as much as he hated this special noise that was now ringing everywhere, in the lab where he was working, in his ears and surely in every other room of the City of the Ancients, no matter how small and unimportant it might be.

Rodney hated being trapped in a cell of a Hive, he hated having to deal with stupid people who considered themselves great scientists without really knowing anything, and he hated having to try and explain how Atlantis worked to the IOA and the SGC, because he knew for sure that they would never in a million years understand how the city that was actually a starship really functioned.

The genius scientist was honest enough to admit that he understood Atlantis only partly himself, and the only one in this universe who understood her almost as good as he did it - okay, perhaps a little bit better considering that Atlantis actually 'talked' to him – was John Sheppard, his team-leader and best friend.

Rodney wasn't sure whether or not the hazel-eyed colonel thought of him as his best friend as well, but John Sheppard was definitely the closest thing to a best friend Rodney had ever had, and the things they had gone through together had formed a strong bond between them that could never be broken again.

The scientist with the piercing blue eyes still had a bad conscience for how he had pushed his best friend to see the truth two weeks ago, telling him bluntly that a dangerous life-sucking alien male space-vampire was in love with him, but John had needed to see the truth at last, and if it was only to save the Wraith's life. He didn't think of Wraith this way in general, but Todd had proved to be different from most of the other Wraith Rodney knew, and he definitely deserved to be saved after helping Atlantis and Earth to defeat the Super-Hive.

Rodney couldn't forget the look on Sheppard's face when he had told him that Todd loved him, and he still wondered which part of the dangerous-life-sucking-alien-male-space-vampire scared John the most of all of them. If he had to guess – something Rodney normally hated to do because guessing was something that could lead to a catastrophe rather quickly living in Pegasus – then it was probably the 'male' which made John uncomfortable the most.

John Sheppard was military, and even though DADT had been repealed some time ago, but it was still in the heads of most military people Rodney knew, and admitting that he was attracted to one of their lethal enemies who was male above all other terrible things must be pretty hard for his friend.

Rodney would have sworn an oath that John returned Todd's feelings, but John's violent reaction after his fateful revelation had proved to the scientist that his friend and team-leader had suppressed his own feelings very successfully until this moment.

The thought of Todd brought Rodney back to the things he hated the most and the terrible noise making his head throb with pain. Rodney still hated most of the Wraith with every fiber of his being, but he had learned to respect and even trust Todd to some extent, and he really wished for Todd being here and working together with him instead of all of these stupid cretins with all of his heart. Everyone would be better than the 'scientists' the IOA had sent to explore Atlantis, and Rodney's fingers were flying over his console to see who of his new co-workers had caused the city to shut down and start the alarm.

“Dr. McKay, what happened?” Major Lorne came running into his lab, and Rodney could have kissed him with gratitude and relief. Major Lorne was one of the few very strong gene-carriers, and Atlantis liked the handsome young major almost as much as she liked John Sheppard, and together they might have the chance to avoid the worst case scenario.

“I'm still trying to find out, major,” he mumbled without looking up from his console, and what he could see made his blood freeze in his veins.

The worst case scenario had already happened, and there was only one way to try and save all of them before it was too late.

It actually didn't matter who had been so stupid to press the false buttons, Rodney wasn't even sure if this was the reason for the alarm and what Atlantis had done, but one thing he knew with deadly certainty – namely that they would all die in one hour if he didn't manage to reach the chair-room together with Major Lorne before the hour was over.

Major Lorne was still waiting for him to enlighten him, but Rodney only waved at him, hurrying to the exit. “No time for explanations, major. We need to reach the chair-room within the next fifty minutes, and I can only hope that Atlantis is willing to let you through as the strongest gene-carrier here. John would be better, but we have to work with what we have.”

Major Lorne just nodded and followed him out of the lab, and Rodney was astonished for a moment that Atlantis hadn't locked the door so far, but he found his suspicion proved to be right when they ran along the corridor and the next door opened for the young major while all the other doors remained firmly shut even though Rodney could hear voices behind them – the desperate cries of other people trying to open them.

“We'll better take the stairs,” Major Lorne said, and Rodney agreed with him although he hated stairs. The constant ringing of the alarm siren made him feel nauseous, but Rodney simply pressed his lips to a thin line and climbed the stairs behind the young major. The meters stretched to miles, and the noises of desperate people hammering against the doors and shouting for help increased the nausea. The radios of course didn't work any longer, no matter how often he tried to reach at least one of the others, and Rodney tried to recall how many people had been in the city when Atlantis had decided to start the self-destruction.

He was totally out of breath when they finally reached the chair-room undisturbed, and Rodney pushed Major Lorne into it with the last shreds of strength he still possessed.

“You need to talk to her and ask her what she wants us to do, Major Lorne. I think I have a suspicion, but I need to know whether or not I'm right with it.”

Major Lorne sat down in the chair, and it lit up like it always did when a gene-carrier sat down on it, moving backwards into a lying position. Lorne closed his eyes with an expression of utter concentration, and the mere fact that Atlantis had opened the doors for them instead of blocking the way to the chair-room was actually proof enough for Rodney that his suspicion was right.

The scientist had gotten the gene-therapy years ago, but he couldn't connect with the City of the Ancients and talk to her like John Sheppard or Major Lorne were able to do, but he caught himself talking to her as he waited for Major Lorne to open his eyes again.

“You're just as homesick as we are, aren't you? You're trapped here and have to endure all of these clumsy and stupid people who just won't leave you alone. I want to go home just as much as you want to do that, but you'll have to give me more time to find a way to make that possible.”

Rodney swallowed, drawing in a shaky breath when Lorne opened his eyes again, looking confused for a moment.

The young major blinked several times as to clear his mind, and the expression in his eyes told Rodney all he needed to know.

“Atlantis will destroy herself if we won't let her return to Pegasus. I've tried to tell her that we're working on that, but I'm not sure that she believes me. She refuses to accept my promise, but she is willing to talk to Colonel Sheppard and wait with the self-destruction for a few more hours.”

Major Lorne stared up at Rodney, and his next words rang louder in his ears than the alarm did.

“We have five hours to bring Colonel Sheppard to the chair-room and let him talk to her, Dr. McKay, or Atlantis will destroy herself when the five hours are over.”


	3. Atlantis' Ultimatum

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Atlantis has started the countdown of her self-destruction, and John is the only one she wants to talk to. Will he get back to her in time and will he be able to convince her not to destroy herself?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My dear readers,
> 
> I'm sorry that this chapter took me so long, but even though I know how this story will go, the plot of the chapters is rather difficult to work out. I had actually wanted to finish _'Life in Pegasus'_ before updating this series again, but I've gotten so much lovely feedback to my beloved Pegasus Alliance series lately that I sat down and wrote the next chapter for you! The next one will take a while again, because I need to think about the plot of the next chapters for a while, but I hope to update some of the other parts for you.
> 
> As always, please leave kudos and comments for me or create a bookmark, your visible love for my stories is my biggest motivation to keep on writing and what feeds my muse and my inspiration the best way. Writing for silent readers only is frustrating and makes me sad. <33

It was a good thing that Mitchell had kept the wormhole to Earth open John thought as he ran through the corridors of his city, because otherwise he wouldn't have made it back in time to the City of the Ancients before Atlantis destroyed herself.

Rodney had bribed Atlantis into allowing him to open a radio channel to the SGC in Cheyenne Mountain to talk to General Landry, promising her that he and Major Lorne would stay in the city as hostages to prove to her that they were taking her seriously and trying to get Colonel Sheppard back where he belonged in Atlantis' – and his own - opinion.

John didn't know what Rodney had said to the general to make him believe him that it was really urgent, and he would have to thank him later for his willingness to risk his own life – again. John had lost track of how many times Rodney had done that for him and Atlantis, but Rodney also knew that John would always risk his own life for him without thinking, so they were even here.

Atlantis let John pass without problems, but she shut the gates and doors close again behind him, and John didn't make the mistake of thinking that the City of the Ancients wouldn't destroy herself like she'd announced to do when the five hours were over if he didn't convince her to give them a last chance to prove their trustworthiness to her. He'd been exploring the ruins together with Daniel Jackson when Cameron had run like hell in their direction, waving and shouting at them to get their attention. The blue-eyed colonel hadn't wasted his breath with long explanations, only yelled that Atlantis had started her self-destruction and that John needed to go back to her instantly and without any further delay.

A helicopter had already waited for him when he had run back to the SGC through the Stargate, and there had only ten minutes been left when the helicopter had landed on one of the piers. The pilot had made it to San Francisco in record time, and he had probably saved hundreds of people with his great deed. John had sent his code when they had come within visible range, and Atlantis must have sensed his life-signs, because the helicopter had been allowed to land without any problems.

Two minutes of the countdown were left when he reached the chair room, greeted excitedly by Rodney and Major Lorne whose faces were white like snow. The horrible noise of the self-destruction stopped at last, but John knew that they weren't out of the woods. Atlantis simply granted them a reprieve, nothing more, nothing less.

“John, thank God!” Rodney groaned when he saw him storming into the chair room, “I'd started to fear that you wouldn't make it. Major Lorne was talking to her the entire time, but she insisted on talking to you. I really hope that you can prove to her that we want her to go back to Pegasus just as much as she wants it. The countdown might have stopped, but she's still shutting down, and the warning lights are still on.”

“I'll do my best, Rodney,” John gasped, taking the seat in the chair Major Lorne had cleared for him. His second-in-command looked exhausted but relieved, and John reassured him with a brief smile before leaning back and closing his eyes.

_'I'm here now, Atlantis, please tell me what I can do to make you give us more time to bring you back home,'_ he thought, underlaying his thoughts with pictures of himself and his team flying her through space.

Atlantis always used pictures when she spoke to him as well, together with emotions John could sense clearly through their link. The emotions he got now were dark and heavy, something akin to despair, anger, betrayal and grim determination that she wouldn't let Earth keep her trapped.

_'I know that you belong to Pegasus, Atlantis. We all belong to Pegasus, and we all want to go back, believe me!'_ John assured her, opening his mind for the images Atlantis wanted to show him.

_'Okay, you tell me that you're needed in Pegasus, that there will be another war and that the Wraith will most likely extinguish all humans if you won't return there soon. I believe you. But I need to convince the SGC and the IOA because I need to get access to another power source for you,'_ John thought, trying his best to tell the city through images what the problem was.

_'Daniel Jackson and I were exploring some ruins of your builders, and we've found some information about another world where at least one ZPM seems to be hidden somewhere. Daniel is still busied with the translation, but if his first guess is right, then this world is under control of a Goa'uld, so we'll need some time to get the ZPM. We can't just go there and take it. We don't have enough power left to fly you back without a ZPM, no matter how much I wished we could return to Pegasus tomorrow already.'_

A bad headache was beginning to throb behind his temples, but John ignored it, waiting for Atlantis to make him see more pictures. At least the waves of anger and despair coming from the sentient city had faded a little bit, and Atlantis seemed to be willing to believe him to some extent.

Atlantis remained silent for a few moments, but then she created more images in John's head, and he felt his knees buckle with relief, glad that he was already sitting.

_'You're willing to give us another month to get the ZPM before you will destroy yourself? That would be four weeks. It's not much, but more than I thought you'd grant us. Well, we'll need to hurry then.'_

He was about to leave the chair when more images flashed in his mind all of a sudden, and John dropped back down with a strangled sound of surprise. _'Oh, well, I didn't expect that!'_ he sent back when Atlantis was finished, uncertain what to make out of her conditions. Atlantis showed him the same pictures again, probably to emphasize how serious she was about her conditions, and the emotions John received through their connection together with the images making clear that her demands were not debatable, and that she would destroy herself in four weeks from now on if the SGC and the IOA didn't agree to everything she wanted.

 

\-----------------------------------

 

“So we have four weeks to get a full ZPM, otherwise Atlantis will destroy herself. Four weeks, hmm. That should be enough for Dr. McKay to find a way to cut the city off from the self-destruction, right?” General Landry asked, pursing his lips with a smug expression on his face. He leaned back in his chair, looking across the table to let his gaze wander to the other participants of the hastily scheduled meeting.

John was glad that General O'Neill had come from Washington the minute he had heard about Atlantis' imminent self-destruction, already waiting for John when he had come back from his negotiations with the City of the Ancients. Colonel Carter was there as well, Daniel Jackson had returned from the planet with the ruins, and Richard Woolsey was sitting beside the chairman of the IOA Mr. Bowy. John missed Teyla and Ronon, but he was grateful that Atlantis had allowed Rodney to accompany him, accepting Major Lorne as the most important of the remaining hostages as long as John was trying to talk some sense into General Landry and Mr. Bowy.

Mr. Bowy had gotten his new post only a couple of weeks ago, and he didn't know anything about the things he had the power to decide about them now. Pegasus was just a small galaxy to him, far away from Earth and ruled by monsters that didn't have any right to exist, and he was literally drooling at the prospect of dismantling the City of the Ancients to get his hands on the technology he would never be able to comprehend or even use.

Atlantis was sentient and older than Mr. Bowy could even imagine, but for him it was just a big piece of technology he could use or destroy just as it pleased him.

John knew Richard Woolsey as a skilled diplomat who always had his face under control no matter what, but even he couldn't hide the expression of dismay and disgust at General Landry's words this time.

Rodney was the first one who found his tongue again, and he looked at the general with the arrogance of a genius scientist talking to an imbecile. “No. It is not possible to cut Atlantis off from her self-destruction without destroying her. The Ancients made sure of that. Nor would I agree to merely think of trying to betray her and actually do that. You can imprison me or kill me, but no. And before you think of that – Colonel Carter is a genius scientist herself, but she won't be able to do that either. No one is.”

Colonel Carter smiled at Rodney, and her stern expression made clear that she wouldn't even think of trying to do that, no matter what General Landry wanted.

Landry narrowed his eyes at him, but General O'Neill's hard glance silenced him before he could threaten Rodney further. “If you say that this is not possible, then it is not possible, Dr. McKay. Besides, Atlantis would know what we're trying to do, and I won't risk the lives of good men just because you can't accept that not everything is going the way you planned it, Hank.”

Landry's jaw worked, but he finally nodded his head. Only Mr. Bowy didn't understand that the president was the only one O'Neill needed to explain himself and his decisions to.

“But you promised us that Atlantis would stay on Earth - and that the IOA would be allowed to use her technology and dismantle her!” he demanded, looking reproachfully at Landry, only to be cut off by John. “With all due respect, sir, but this is not going to happen. We have four weeks to get a full ZPM for her flight back to Pegasus, otherwise she will destroy herself and you'll get nothing. Atlantis is much more useful to the IOA when she's back in Pegasus and still intact than she'll be if you have to try to collect the few molecules that are left from her from the ocean bed.”

“I've translated most of the information the Ancients left for their successors, and I think that I know where the ZPM is that they hid on another planet before they descended. The young Jaffa we've brought back to the SGC was helpful, and he confirmed my suspicion that the Goa'uld Du'ral he's serving is searching for the ZPM as well. He sent a small army of Jaffa to the planet to get it, so we'll have to fight against them when we'll go there, and we shouldn't waste any more time with discussions if we want to be successful.”

“I don't have enough teams for such a mission if there is actually an entire army of Jaffa waiting for you on the other side of the wormhole, Dr. Jackson!” Landry snapped, but John wasn't willing to let him get away with that.

“I don't need more than my own team and Colonel Mitchell's team, General, they will be more than enough to defeat the Jaffa!”

Landry's frustrated expression turned back into the smug grin John wanted to wipe from his face so badly. “Which team are you talking about, Colonel Sheppard? You don't mean Dr. McKay, Teyla and this strange Neanderthaler Ronon with that? I won't allow two people coming from another galaxy to be a part of a SGC-team! Plus, Dr. McKay is one of Atlantis' hostages and needs to stay with her, right?”

“You'll have no other choice than to let Teyla and Ronon come with me, General,” John said, feeling smug now himself. “Atlantis will only wait with her destruction for four more weeks if we agree to each of her demands,” he informed the other members of the meeting, earning surprised glances from Mr. Bowy, Colonel Carter, Richard Woolsey and General Landry himself. O'Neill just grinned as if he had expected something like this, Rodney already knew about Atlantis' clamors, and Daniel was experienced and foresighted enough not to be surprised about John's next words.

“Atlantis has gained enough information about humans to expect that some of us would try to cut her off from her self-destruction, and she won't let Dr. McKay return to her without the ZPM. She will kill each of the remaining scientists who'll make any attempt to do that and manipulate her, and she doesn't want to risk having to kill her chief scientist Rodney. She was very clear about that. Major Lorne will stay her hostage for as long as I'm away, and the same goes for the Marines and scientists that are still trapped in the city. She has shut down completely, and she will destroy herself if you try to approach her with planes or helicopters. General O'Neill is allowed to use a helicopter and land on one of her piers one single time, but he has to come personally and without any more Marine. She allows him to bring supplies for her hostages that will last for four weeks to Atlantis, and General O'Neill is supposed to talk to Major Lorne via radio to inform him and her about our progression every day.”

O'Neill didn't look as if he minded Atlantis' conditions, on the contrary. He seemed to be pleased at the prospect of spending the next four weeks in Cheyenne Mountain and get on the younger general's nerves for a while.

John paused, enjoying how Mr. Bowy's eyes threatened to fall out of his head. “Any more demands, Colonel?” Landry asked dryly in the failed attempt to be humorous, and John leaned back in his chair and pursed his lips like the general had done it at the beginning of the meeting.

“There is indeed more. Atlantis demands that every member of the expedition team will return to Pegasus with her – at least those who want to return – which will be most of them if I had to guess. This includes Teyla and Ronon as well. He's Satedan, by the way, the Neanderthalers are extinct for several millennia as you should actually know, General. They also never lived in the Pegasus Galaxy as far as we know...”

Landry suppressed a growl, trying to look nonchalantly. “Atlantis is not in the position to demand anything, but I won't say anything against the Athosian and the 'Satedan' returning to their home.”

“Atlantis is in the position to demand everything she wants to have, believe me. You won't risk losing her completely, Hank,” O'Neill stated, and the other general suppressed another frustrated noise. John resisted the urge to rub his hands when he came to Atlantis' last – and for him most pressing and important – demand.

“The city also informed me about her last condition, and she was actually very insistent about it,” John said, holding Landry's glance with his own to make sure that the general got the message.

“The Wraith Todd has to return to Pegasus together with us – unharmed and healthy. He is to release from his prison cell instantly and without any further delay after our meeting.”

“You're not serious about that!” Landry shouted, losing his self-control at last, and Mr. Bowy let out a howl of mortal fear. “The Wraith will not be set free, not by any means!” he screamed, his eyes bulging again. “He's too dangerous!”

“This condition is not debatable, Mr. Bowy. Todd risked his life for us, he left his home to save a planet he doesn't owe anything, and he has proved himself worthy to be our ally many times since our first encounter. Todd is the one Wraith who can make a difference, being willing to cooperate with us to bring peace to his home and search for a solution for the feeding problem. He still has allies among the other Wraith, and Atlantis sees the greater behind and knows that we'll need him and this alliance with him and his Hives to save the humans living in Pegasus. Making sure that they will be secure is her deepest concern, and I agree with her that we'll need Todd to achieve this goal.”

“Todd how you call this monster is the reason why Earth was attacked in the first place!” Landry snarled, but John shook his head grimly. He'd once thought the same, but Todd was not responsible for the betrayal of his second, and he wouldn't have needed to come with John to save Earth at all, informing Atlantis about the threat of the Super-Hive would have been enough.

“He's not a monster, he's an intelligent and sentient being, and he only feeds to survive himself!” John hissed, wondering what it was making him defend Todd like that. “We humans kill for lesser reasons, and Todd has never enjoyed taking another intelligent being's life like some other Wraith do. Not all Wraith are the same, and it is only fair that he'll finally get his freedom back!”

“I can't believe that we're even having this discussion! The Wraith is a monster, and he will stay imprisoned, this is my last word!” Mr. Bowy screamed, but O'Neill ignored him. “Can you grant that he won't try to attack and kill anyone if we set him free, John?”

John opened his mouth, but it was Richard Woolsey who spoke up, coming to John's help unexpectedly. “I trust Todd's word. He doesn't take it well if he thinks that he has been betrayed, I had to make this experience myself, but if we grant him his safe return to Pegasus, then he will cooperate with us and not be a threat.”

John swallowed, smiling at the older man. “Thank you, Richard. Atlantis wants you to be her civilian leader again after her return, by the way. She showed me images of whom she wants to return with her the most, and you were sitting in your office and doing your job in one of the pictures she showed me.” Richard blushed and looked touched and even a little bit flattered. “Thank you, Colonel, I wish to return to Pegasus as well, Please tell her that the next time you'll talk to her.”

John nodded. “I will tell her, Richard, and Atlantis will be happy about your decision. Plus, you're right with what you said about Todd. Todd will cooperate with us, and he's trustworthy. His wish is to return to Pegasus, and he won't endanger his freedom and his return by trying to feed on one of the Marines or so. Besides, I'll need him to be a part of my team when we'll go on that ZPM-mission, his strength and his skills will be crucial for the success of our mission.”

“We will agree to Atlantis' demands, to each one of them. This meeting is closed, we have to hurry to get the ZPM in time. John, I want to have a word with you – alone. Daniel, please start preparing everything we'll need to get this ZPM. Tell Teal'C and Colonel Mitchell to get ready for that mission together with John's team. Carter, I want you to go with them as well.” General O'Neill stood, and Landry and Bowy didn't have any other chance than to do the same and accept his decision.

John followed General O'Neill out of the meeting room, silently thanking Atlantis for what she had done.

 

\-----------------------------------------------

 

Todd hadn't expected John to come back to him before it would be the right time to kill him and release him from his misery, but he had expected General Landry and the impudent human Mr. Bowy from the IOA to do their experiments on him, and he found himself unable to mediate properly as long as he didn't know why they had spared him so far.

He could hear the footsteps of his wardens before the door from time to time, and his sensitive sense of hearing caught some of the words they exchanged with the other Marines when the changing of the guards was due. He could have tried to get into their heads and read their minds to some extent, as Todd doubted that the Marines watching him were trained to keep telepaths out of their heads.

Only few male Wraith were capable of truly reading human minds and thoughts instead of only making them see images and sense their emotions. But experienced officers in high positions normally had this ability and could even invade minds of humans that had a natural or artificial barrier that protected them from telepathic intrusion.

Grown-up Queens could tear down even the strongest barrier and force their will upon their victims, and Todd had regretted that he didn't have the power to do that countless times when he had been a prisoner of the Genii. He could read even the deeper thoughts his human prey kept hidden deep inside if he concentrated hard enough, but for some reasons he couldn't quite explain to himself he hesitated to read the minds of his guards here on Earth. He felt as if he was betraying the only human who had ever really meant something to him, the human who had left him here in this gray prison cell to die the slow death of starvation.

Even now that he had finally come to realize that John Sheppard would never return his feelings he couldn't do what would have helped him to escape, thinking that if the colonel with the hazel eyes and the messy dark hair wanted him to die here, then he would accept his wish and not fight against his captors and try to prolong the inevitable with that.

The sound of fast footsteps coming nearer rose him from his musings, and Todd stood because he wanted to look down at his tormentors when they came to get him and start their experiments. There was still some pride left in him, and Todd lifted his chin up and ignored the ridiculous gray frock-like clothing they had forced upon him when they had taken his Wraith clothes away from him.

The door opened with a protesting noise, and Todd actually startled back when Sheppard's tousled shock of hair appeared in the doorway, the colonel's face showing a grim and furious expression. He stepped back, and John frowned before his face softened when he realized that Todd thought that his anger was directed at him.

“These narrow-minded and stupid pigheads!” he growled, offering Todd a halfway sheepish and halfway apologetic smile. “I'm so sorry that it took me so long to find a way to release you from this cell, Todd. The bosses of the IOA and the SGC consist mostly of idiots – except for a few people like Richard and General O'Neill. Landry sent me on one mission after the other, I had barely time to change into a fresh uniform in between. Thank God General O'Neill is here now to make sure that everything will be all right.”

Todd unclenched his fingers and took a cautious step forward again. “So you negotiated my freedom successfully, John Sheppard?” he asked, still wary and not willing to believe the shorter man just like that.

Sheppard pulled a grimace. “I would like to claim that merit as mine, but you actually have to thank Atlantis for that. It was her taking matters in her own 'hands', so to speak, I was just her emissary telling Landry and Bowy her demands.”

Todd regarded Sheppard with a blank face. “I see,” he said, even though he wasn't sure that he understood anything of what was going on. Sheppard sighed, and he changed his face color much to Todd's surprise when he let his eyes travel over his appearance.

“We're actually in a hurry, and I will tell you everything on our way to PX-901. I – I brought you your clothes, Todd. I'll wait outside, please knock at the door when you're dressed properly again.”

This was more than Todd could have hoped for, and he took the clothes John was handing him with a pleased sound of gratitude. His well-trained senses told him that this was not the right time to ask questions, and he only nodded and said:

“Thank you, John Sheppard, I shall hurry.”

“Uhm yes, please do that.” Sheppard shifted his weight, and Todd's eyes widened when the change in the human's scent tickled in his nose and in his sensor slits, a strong wave of suppressed emotions radiating from the hazel-eyed colonel hitting him without any warning. Todd had always known that John Sheppard desired him physically, his pheromones betraying him every time he came too close to Todd. But this time it was more, something going so much deeper than just physical attraction, and Todd stared at the door closing behind Sheppard when the human almost fled out of the cell, stunned by the revelation that his hope that John would return his feelings one day was apparently not completely in vain.

John had actually feared for his life, caring enough about his well-being that he was hardly keeping himself together. Todd felt a strong wave of possessiveness and protectiveness surge through him, reviving his spirits and even quenching the fire of his hunger that had started to burn inside him a couple of days ago with full force.

Colonel John Sheppard was his, meant to become his chosen consort one day, and Todd would protect him and fight at his side regardless of his own safety and well-being. He would endure each and every offense and experiment Landry and Bowy would come up with, and he wouldn't give up until he had proved to John that he was worthy to be trusted and become his loving mate.

John Sheppard was his, he had been his from the moment on they had met in Kolya's bunker, and Todd would defend what was his at all costs. He was Wraith, a proud and powerful Commander, and the most remarkable human he had ever encountered in his incredibly long life was worth all the pain, doubts and hardships Todd had gone through for his sake. John was worthy to be courted until he realized that he and the Wraith he'd sworn to kill so many times belonged together, and Todd would wait patiently until John was ready to accept the truth.

The truth that Todd loved him and that John loved Todd in return just as much.

**Author's Note:**

> My dear readers, I have been away from this fandom for a rather long time, and I have come back to it only recently because of a faithful reader who encouarged me to update my beloved Wraith stories again. I am one of those writers needing visible feedback and encouragement in form of kudos, comments and bookmarks for my stories.  
> My stories are always getting a lot of hits, but only few kudos and comments, most of you are silent readers. If you enjoy my stories and want me to update them on a regular basis, then please press the kudos button and leave a comment for me, I really need your support to stay motivated and not lose the passion for my stories. I write and update them to share them with you, so please give me something back and don't be silent readers only. <33


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